Clara

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Clara is the thirty-second video in the Maddison Atkins video series. It is also the twentieth video in Chapter 2.

Transcript

Marla: I can film this, right?

Clara: Yeah, sure.

Marla: Uhm, listen Clara, I'm really sorry if I came across as harsh earlier. I didn't mean to. We want to see you happy and healthy and we want to see you, you know, graduate - finish your doc. You know?

Clara:Yeah... I mean that's not ... I mean, I don't know what to say I mean, it's not... I mean don't worry about the other day, it's totally cool, its understandable, I mean there's nothing I can say to you, I mean I can't talk to you. I can't talk to you all, I can't talk to all of you. I mean I've done what I can. And I.. uh.. I've... I've been real busy, I've worked a lot of shifts, and just haven't had the time and you know, apparently I'm not doing it the way I'm supposed to anyway... so I really don't, uh...

Marla: You want to graduate, right?

Clara: I mean, yeah, uh, yeah of course I do. That's not the most important thing right now.

Marla: Well, you wanna make docs though? You want to do something in your life?

Clara: Yeah, but. I mean, look, okay, the closer I get to this thing and the longer it takes and uhm... seeing everything, just remembering everything, and just going through it all, I can't. I mean, like I said I can't talk to you. I can't talk to all of you. It's not anything that anybody can do. This is something that nobody, nobody at all can do. It's really hard being here right now.

Marla: Is somebody threatening you? Are you okay? Are you safe?

Clara: Nobody's threatening me. I mean, I don't feel safe. I mean, the more I get into this, it's just the less safe I feel and the more vivid the nightmares. So - so I'm just - I choose to disappear.

Marla: Can we help? At all?

Clara: No. I wish that somebody could, but no. I don't... uhm ... look, just, uhm, stay here as long as you want. I'm gonna leave. And just uhm... I'll just come back and lock the deadbolt later. Okay?

Marla: Are you sure?

Clara: Yeah, yeah, I'm sure. So, enjoy your time here...(rising to leave) and uh, I guess I'll see you around.

Marla: Okay. Clara, if there's anything that anyone can ever do for you...

Clara: I'll let you know.